It’s All in How You Look at Things

I read a post the other day about women who live under the illusion that other women are perfect.  The writer, Sabrina, wrote about how she was still crying for no reason three and a half months after her baby boy was born.  She felt like she was the only one experiencing this, and pointed to all the “other” moms out there who are able to handle everything with such grace.

I imagine she was surprised at many of the comments.  Most people said they thought she was one of those “other” moms, handling everything perfectly.

I wonder why this seems to happen over and over.  Women take their very worst qualities and set them right next to the very best qualities of their friends.  In fact, nothing they do is as good as what other women do.

But how is that even fair?  It’s like me trying to slam dunk a basketball, and then really hating myself because I can’t — even though Michael Jordan can.  Why don’t I instead say, “Man, Michael Jordan really stinks at breastfeeding.”

I understand we present our best selves to the world, and hide all the ugly, yucky things we hate about ourselves.  And I understand that does tend to create false perceptions of reality.

Even though Sabrina’s post and the comments had nothing to do with me, I felt a little self conscious after reading it.  I started to wonder if I present my best self, and decided I better clear up a thing or two.

There aren’t many perfect women out there… but you are so lucky to know me because I happen to be that “other” woman who has it all together.  Be jealous.  Let me demonstrate.

I have the cleanest silverware on the block.

Removing silverware from the dishwasher is the drudgeriest of the drudges, in my opinion.  Rather than remove it and put it in the drawer, I let it cycle through the dishwasher again and again until my husband unloads the dishwasher.  Since he is currently working two jobs and spends a fourth of a fruit fly’s lifetime at home each week, that’s not too often.  We’ll soon be eating with our hands.

I read a book a week, or close to it.

That’s because I frequently lock myself in the bathroom with a book when I need a break.  My daughter, the constant debater, can’t argue for my time when “Nature” calls me.

My daughter hardly ever eats sweets…

because I eat them all when she isn’t looking.

My daughter has the cleanest bedroom…

or not.  I don’t really know because I close my eyes when I go in or near so I can avoid facing the likely mess and subsequently dealing with it.  But I sure live in a state of ignorant bliss, tell you what.

See?  It’s all in how you choose to look at things.  Read the bold words, and forget the rest.  That’s what you’re doing when you look at Suzy Q down the street with her perfect makeup, high profile job and impeccably-dressed kids, so do the same for yourself!